Fifty Shades of Gary

The big news is that my new book, Love Lettahs From Maine, is now available at Amazon.com in print and as a Kindle download. It made me laugh to write it, so I hope it will amuse others. Here it is:

Of course, there's a picture of it to the on the side of this page, too. If you click on that it will take you right to the Amazon.com page. Technology, huh?

Now you are probably thinking, wow, two huge books in one year! Love Lettahs From Maine and the Harper Lee sequel to To Kill a Mockingbird. That's why I released my book now, instead of in the summer. I didn't want my book to take away from her sales.  After all, Harper Lee hasn't released a book in over fifty years, so I'll let her have the number one spot. Yes, I really am that thoughtful and generous.

A friend suggested that I write a book and title it Fifty Shades of Gary. Mine will be about a middle-aged balding man who has been faithful to the same woman for ten years. They have kids and both work multiple jobs and on the rare occasions that they are alone they are usually too tired to even stay awake, let alone think about sex. There will be exciting, provocative things in the book, like the sleep mask his wife puts on when she wants to sleep and he's watching television. There will also be lubricants, like the oil he puts in his snowblower. There'll also be toys that plug in, like the generator and the weed wacker, and some that use batteries, like the kids' remote control cars. And the setting will be a ranch house in Maine that's surrounded by snow for half the year. Sounds as exciting as Fifty Shades of Grey, doesn't it? I just hope I don't get in trouble for plagiarism.

Until I get around to writing that, though, I'll work on other things. Like shoveling out from the foot and a half of snow we are expecting this weekend. One month until spring, one month until spring, one month until spring...